Walking into a local senior high school I was met with a friendly and open face. A young man whom I worked with in Minneapolis reached out, “Hey how is my old boss? So glad to see you out here!”. It was one of those moments where I would not have expected to know anyone, and then realized the connections in our community run deep and far. This senior high school is not that far from the city center, but it can feel like a world away when walking down the halls. When the community became aware of hate speech displayed in the boy’s bathroom, things changed. I don’t know this, but I would bet that it was not the first time that any student acted out in a harmful way toward others at the school. How was this incident different? Maybe because the media got a quick hold, maybe because emotions were high after the elections, maybe because the attention is focused on how a majority white school will (78%) handle this one!
This is an opportunity for all of us to reflect and support this school to create a culture to repair this specific harm (not expel the student), and set the stage for a different culture. Mistakes will be made by students and staff as they have in the past. Will they be punished or given full opportunity to be accountable? The school community can use this as an opportunity to create a safe school for ALL students. Principals are expected to find and reveal who did the act, make sure they admit it and are dutifully punished. Yet, sometimes we don’t discover who are the culprits, can’t make students admit to wrong doing, and then punishment becomes a temporary fix to a long term problem. The heart of restorative measures is a different approach with lasting effects. When leadership decides on a restorative response they create opportunities to listen to all parties, repair the harm, and make a plan for the future. It works, it takes time, it takes listening longer, and it takes allowing each person to have their own truth. Can’t force the truth…I think we have seen that in our election coverage from all sides. Can’t force integrity, we can only model that through listening and standing for what we believe instead of ‘against’ someone else.
I expect the district decision-makers to support restorative process. I know there are many in the community that believe the same. Zero tolerance will not resolve this issue and will not build the safe school the community needs now more than ever.